Satire Blog Posts

Hi, I am a professional and SEO friendly article writer. I am running a team of some skilled article writers ( U.S.A, U.K, and Kenya). I have more than six years of experience in article writing service, and approximate 2000+ articles have been published online. My charge per content is very affordable. So, If you want a readable, engaging and accurate copy, then look no further. I am sure that I can deliver the content on time. I am eagerly waiting for your reply. Thanks with best regards jannatun

Hey, I hope you're having a wonderful day. I've gone through the details and I'd love to work on this. I have a really great experience in SEO keywords research-based articles and blog content writing, I think I can perfectly handle this and I'm very confident to tack this up. Yeah, you will be glad to know that I have rich experience in FASHION and SATIRICAL writing. I'm able to use cuss words in my writing. 1. I would be happy to help you what you need from me. 2.I would be happy to help you within your budget and deadline. My content will be 100% unique, easy, attractive, engaging to your targeted audience, and plagiarism free. I only believe in quality work and always willing to deliver over my client's expectations. Best

Hi Dear...! I have read and understood all your initial requirements, and I feel, I would be the best choice for this project, I have more than 10 years of working experience in the industry. I am producing quality content for my clients including; ARTICLE WRITING, ESSAY WRITING, RESEARCH PAPERS, THESIS & DISSERTATIONS. I can provide you 100% quality even in a short period. I can assure you, "You will hire me again and again after getting my first service". Waiting for your message.!! (https://www.freelancer.com/u/assignsolver)

Hi there, Here is a very short sample, I hope you like it. As an adult, living is stressful and packing/traveling just adds more suicidal thoughts in the game. Worry not, I got your ass covered! This guide will help you not kill yourself while you’re dealing with hiding away that stash of um... medicine in the much needed pair of socks, the right amount of undies and vibrators, in case things get too boring. Yes, a vibrator, I’m sure you didn’t think of that but that’s why I’m here. Let’s dive right into the adult packing guide! I'd love to write this whole article for you and I'm confident I can do a great job at it. I can manage up to 7 article a week. Looking forward to hearing back from you. Regards, Aneequa S.

"""Dear Mr/Mrs I hope you are having a wonderful day. This is Connor from the United States. A dedicated, trusted, proven and talented Article writer with vast and varied experience. I have intensive expertise in Fashion, Beauty and fashion writing and that I will write distinctive and top quality content regarding fashion, health & fitness, beauty or fashion. My expertise areas: - Beauty - Skincare - Hairstyles - Jewelry - Nail Art - Makeup - Fashion Trends Please invite me via chat so we can discuss the details of the project and provide you an exact quote with a timeline. Cheers,"

Hi there! I came across your post and found that my expertise is the best fit for this job. So, I’d like to work with you to produce the best result. Along with that, I can assure you that my rates are more than reasonable in the market. I believe I'm the best candidate for this project. Please give me a chance to prove my skills. So, please send me a message so that we can discuss more. Best regards, Sujan

Hello Sir/Madam, My name is FATIMA and writing is my passion “When I say work, I only mean writing. Everything else is just an odd job”. From my early age, I enjoyed reading novels and stories, as I was growing up it has become my passion now. I am professionally active in the field of writing since 2010 for my clients on different platforms. Thank you

My friend... My prices are the lowest, my work is always original and I will give it before the deadline. I am producing quality content for my clients including; ARTICLE WRITING, ESSAY WRITING, RESEARCH PAPERS, THESIS & DISSERTATIONS. "Kindly try me Once, and get impressed forever"Click to the link and lets chat https://www.freelancer.com/u/IdealExpert

Hi there, what you're looking for is a competent writer for your blog and I'd like to put my name forth. With over 5 years of experience in articles and blog writing, I possess the necessary skills to work according to your expectations. With creative and researched content for the blog, I'll be incorporating effective keywords for interior design, lifestyle and business making sure you get traffic on your blog. The articles will be engaging and fun to read. Since our account is new on this platform, we're looking to offer discounted rates. Come over chat so I can share samples. Looking forward to your response! Thanks, Bill A

Hi sir, I can finish this work within a very short period, with a high quality content. I have master degree of laws and a diploma in Economics. I am a research writer and a translator. Send me and we will agree on everything.

Hi-I'm a native English speaker and writer who can deliver 5 articles a week. I'm keeping this brief so I have space to include the re-write: Pack That Damn Backpack, Moron! Ok, let’s say someone you met in a bar last night says: Dude! Beat it-go for a hike! Well, dude, this article is for you. I’m gonna save you 230% of your time and your humiliation rate will (finally!) drop by at least 5 points, okay? Like those guys said when they borrowed your wallet-trust us, we got this. Does your little sister have a Hello Kitty backpack? Dump whatever the hell that loser has in it, hopefully she’s got some decent weed you can take. Stick your shoes on your feet (Not in the backpack, dickhead!) and if you want to give yourself a change of clothes, okay, why not? It's your life. You can probably think of something to tell the cops when they find you in the park with your pants off. You don’t need plug in chargers wherever you’re going- screw technology, anyway. Just pile in all the snacks you can find in the kitchen- you know how you get when you’ve smoked all your sister’s weed. Leave your own ID at home, but if you have a picture of someone who looks a little like you ( any asshole with ID works) take that so if you need to rob a house or something, you can drop that behind. It’s the pro-tip that works in +20 top countries where losers like you plan to get lost. So, go already! This packing list has already saved you 10 fucking hours! Take a hike!

I,ll be here for you .i,ll be write article and ghost writing for you

i am a good article writer and i am also a translator and creative writer.i can write in reasonable cost.

I will do this in a best way I am expert of this work I am a best writer and a good typer i am good in acrtical writing

Hi I am interested in your project. I am comfortable with the pay as well. I have skills and previous experience, successfully completing similar projects such as website content, article rewriting, content development, and high-quality article writing. Let us connect so I can share some of my sample works for your review Looking forward to being awarded the project

Sample of your paragraph Grown adult asking how to pack a bag is frequent message that we receive and we can understand it because they never arranged their school bag so what would expect Relevant Skills and Experience Mom started to yell and cuss as soon as yo don't pack the ugly sweater she bought. mom we don't need this shit We are sucker for thing like power bank, earphones and secret stash of.....Candy

Hello, future employer This sh*t sounds like a perfect match for me! I'm a Journalism Major with a minor in satire, so I know that I'm exactly what you're looking for. How can I help you? I can write at least 10 articles a week and I'm a native English speaker —not some hack looking to fake it for a few bucks. I'll be thorough in making sure all your needs are met on time, which means you'll have less to worry about when it comes to your copy and more time to focus on the things that really matter to you. Here's an example of how I would rewrite your sample: "If you've ever had to pack when traveling to foreign destinations, you know that most of the space is taken by sh*t that we don’t need! Is that ugly sweater mom bought you really necessary? Things like a mini power bank, an extra set of earbuds, and your secret stash of tasty ass snacks on the other hand...well we're suckers for things like that. One of the keys to using 100% of your space is to pack things tightly, and don't think twice about storing some of your items in your other items. Are you confused? For example, if you're not putting all of the socks you pack inside the shoes you pack you're doing that sh*t WRONG! You can also fit power chords in pockets, just think about it and make sure you use every inch of space. 3 million people are traveling outside of the country on any given day. If you plan to be one of them, you're definitely going to need these tips also..." Now let's get this sh*t started!

Hello! I would love to work on this project! I can write 7 articles per week. Here is an example: Some of us are born with a natural ability to organize our sh*t. My mother is one of those people. She packs an away bag like a drill instructor on Adderall. (She cleans the counters that way too, but anyway…) To her dismay—and in spite of her meticulous instruction—I am not one of those people. Most of my life, I’ve packed like I’m slam-dunking my possessions into a black hole. Recently, however, I had the opportunity to travel abroad. I tried packing my way, but eventually my suitcase vomited my clothing back onto me. I realized with some measure of panic that the Black Hole Method wasn’t going to work. It wasn’t until I instinctively reached for a backup pair of earbuds that an epiphany dawned on me: I’ve been traumatized enough by organized people to have learned some helpful-a** tips for this situation. Sample Tip #1 – Yeah, Bring Backup Earbuds Okay, you’re going to want to look at some foreign sh*t and listen to your favorite music. It’s amazing, but even more importantly? You’ll probably be taking a lot of public transportation to get there. According to Trip Advisor, 26% of people ages 18-34 have used a train during their vacation. So let me tell you something valuable: babies all scream in the same f***ing language. A crying infant sucks just as much in Germany as it does in California, so bring two sets of earbuds in case you lose or damage your primary pair.

I can write around 6 articles of 500 words each, number increases as words decrease. Hey there! Packing up for that 'luxurious' trip to Hawaii you got at a discount price with a sh*tty airline? Boring stuff like books or those third-rate travel guides you know you'll never look at taking up all the space? Or maybe you just wanna sit on your a** and play videogames or scroll through Instagram all day instead of taking the time to organise. Either way, we've got you covered. Here's 10 ways to pack with all your stuff in place and good to go, so you don't have to bust your top in a crowded place crawling with security and people, just because you put your passport in the check-in lugguage, and end up having to take a trip to jail instead!